If There’s a Will, There’s Definitely a Way!

Addiction, Procrastination, and Laziness:
A Proactive Guide to the Psychology of Motivation

Author: Roman Gelperin

Publisher: Self-published, Middletown, DE, 2018

This is a small book (114 pages) which packs a big message. The bottom line is this: There is hope for behavioral addicts, procrastinators, and the lazy who want to control or stop their addictions, procrastinations, or laziness. As I read the book, I was reminded of the old riddle:

           Q: How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
           A: Only one, but the light bulb has got to want to change!

You and I (assuming we are concerned about our addictive habits, our procrastinations, and/or our laziness) are the ‘light bulb’. Roman Helperin is the ‘psychologist’.

He holds to the idea that “Nearly all self-observant persons will concede that they are not in full control of their behavior.” Then he explains why. . . and what can be done about it.

Helperin starts his book off with five examples which almost every reader can identify with – either personally, or they know someone just like that. Each example represents a multitude of other cases readers may be familiar with.  They are:

1.     The person who has a project to complete but keeps putting it off until the last minute.

2.     The person who really wants to go to the gym to work out but seems to be unmotivated to do so.

3.     The smoker who wants to stop.

4.     The person who cannot stop playing video games.

5.     The person who cannot get out of bed in the morning.

For each of these Helperin shares their frustrations. He takes us through their mental and emotional feelings.  He helps us understand their fear and the impact of not succeeding. He explains the various motivations and pleasures of wanting to succeed but also those associated with continuing in their present condition.  He distinguishes between ‘acts’ and ‘results’, contending that people do not necessarily pursue ‘acts’ that they are involved in, but rather the ‘results’ of those acts.  He shows us that there are both positive (pleasure) and negative (pain) forces for both stopping and commencing any given activity.  The greater forces win out. But our ‘willpower’ can overcome a force. It all makes for interesting, although sometimes, complex reading. 

But he doesn’t leave us there. He introduces us to some very practical strategies (what he calls ‘Our Toolbox’ to conquer the challenges before us.

For starters, we need to understand how our physical environment impacts our ability to stand up to the challenge we are trying to overcome. The frequency of applying such changes improves the likelihood of success with respect to what we are trying to achieve. The success of this is augmented by its frequency. A second strategy is to target the pleasure of overcoming the challenge. Involving others who can act as social motivators to your pursuit can also be very beneficial to your goals.  He introduces a technique called ‘splitting your attention’ to make the hard tasks more doable – but he cautions that some tasks become impossible when attention is split.  (I found this section most interesting, as I reflect on watching television and working on an essay at the same time; or watching my grandchildren working on homework – especially math – and listening to music with their headphones. His comments on this are most interesting.). And there are a number of other equally helpful tools he presents for us to utilize in our different situations.

Finally, Helperin returns to his five examples and applies all the theory he has discussed to each of them, explaining what each person could do to be successful.  Where there’s a will to achieve something or to quit something or to change one’s behavior – there’s definitely a way!

This book is recommended for all those (from teenagers and up) who recognize they’re currently behaving in ways they would rather not. Counselors will also find it a great guide to help their clients overcome addiction, procrastination, and laziness. Well worth the time and effort to check it out.

n Ken B. Godevenos, President, Accord Resolutions Services Inc., Toronto, Ontario, August 26, 2018, www.accordconsulting.com

It would be great if you would share your thoughts or questions on this blog in the comments section below or on social media.